There are 4 distinct styles of response at the good news of someone else (partner, friend, kid, spouse, etc.):
- Active Constructive
- Passive Constructive
- Active Destructive
- Passive Destructive
Example: The husband/wife returns home at the afternoon:
- Honey! I got the promotion!!
Spouse: (Select one of the following to find your current response style!)
Welldonebaby! Amazing news, I knew you will do it! How do you feel now?(looks into her/his eyes)
Wait for me to open a nice bottle of wine to celebrate this!
Ah ok… [pause of several seconds] That’s very good for you.
(Gazing at his/her shoes)
And now we are going to see you even less? Are you sure you can manage with more obligations?
Well, we have so many problems and you only care about yourself…