Emotional Intelligence
EQ and IQ
According to the work of Daniel Goleman, Emotional Intelligence (EQ) contributes an 80% to success in life. On the other hand, IQ provides the rest 20%. Although none of them is considered fixed and permanent, Emotional Intelligence has the greater margins for growth. In other words, EQ can be trained. Let’s check the levels of our own EQ and see how we can improve it!
Exercise: Check your EQ
Below, you will find a list of qualities, people with high emotional intelligence demonstrate. Check which of those you possess and give them a mark from 1-10.
- [ ] Self-control and self-discipline
- [ ] Impulse control
- [ ] Openness, adaptation and embracing change
- [ ] Ability to perform under conditions of pressure
- [ ] Good understanding of own emotions
- [ ] Good understanding of the emotions of others
- [ ] Awareness of strengths and weaknesses
- [ ] Optimism
- [ ] Self-confidence
- [ ] Good communication skills
- [ ] Acceptance of criticism by other people
- [ ] Disagreeing without causing tension
- [ ] Offering constructive criticism
- [ ] Initiative taking
- [ ] Cultivating trust in relationships
- [ ] Self-motivation in order to reach goals
- [ ] Ability to lead and influence
- [ ] Resist prejudice
- [ ] Decisiveness
- [ ] Persuasion
- [ ] Patience
- [ ] Persistence
- [ ] Curiosity
- [ ] Ability to inspire others
- [ ] Cooperating without competing
- [ ] Teamworking
- [ ] Maintaining control in crisis situations
- [ ] Control impatience
- [ ] Ability to focus
- [ ] Acceptance of defeat and failure
- [ ] Listening before talking
- [ ] Acceptance of our weaknesses
- [ ] Personal and work ethics
- [ ] Ability to neutralize toxic people
- [ ] Giving without expecting
- [ ] Knowing when and feeling comfortable saying no
- [ ] Ability to slow down, disconnect and relax
- [ ] Quick recovery after a mistake or failure
- [ ] Robust emotional vocabulary
- [ ] Resist perfectionism
I have vs I want
Now, identify which skills you already have and which you want. Check those that you score high and those you score low. Then, write them down in two separate columns, as shown of the following table:
I have enough | I want to improve |
1. | |
2. | |
3. | |
4. | |
5. | |
6. | |
7. | |
8. | |
9. | |
10. |
Lock the target
Finally, let’s lock the target. Make a special note of those which seem particularly appealing to you. That is, the ones you would like to see in your new version. You need to be clear about why you want them. Also, what will be the benefit of having them. If you know any people possessing these qualities, why not take them as role models?
Let this new realization linger in your mind for the days to come. As long as you keep it in your radar, you will surely find the ways to upgrade yourself.
___________
Also, see the article: Gratitude Jar: Empower your gratitude muscles!
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